Friday Links

Happy Friday, it’s been a hard week after the joy of the birthday it was back to earth with a bump! Here are this week’s links..

How to fall back in love with your job. I’m never going to love working. My idea of heaven is pretty much being in my house with something to read, a glass of wine (or a G&T) and maybe some cake. However, life doesn’t work like that, so I have a job to pay for the luxury of the books, wine, gin and cake. This really is a reminder to focus on positive stuff but it’s always good to have strategies…

Sali Hughes on First World Problems. This. A thousand times this.

Obviously a little perspective and a degree of self-awareness is a good thing. Someone I knew once told me, with tears in his eyes, that his father had clearly never loved him because he’d bought him an inferior set of golf clubs for an upcoming holiday. My sympathy was minimal, my giggles barely contained. And if I were publicly whinging that my caviar was too round then I’d hope someone would give me a little talking to. Gratitude, too, is important, and to take stock of what you do have, as opposed to what you don’t, is an exercise that is always worthwhile. But it’s a stupid mistake to use any yardstick to judge the unmathematical, irrational and wholly subjective matter of human emotion. Problems aren’t relative, and to pop each of them onto some imagined scale of validity to determine how we should feel about them is bonkers.

Only the rich can afford to write about poverty. 

As for commentary about poverty – a disproportionate share of which issues from very well paid, established, columnists like David Brooks of the New York Times and George Will of the Washington Post – all too often, it tends to reflect the historical biases of economic elites, that the poor are different than “we” are, less educated, intelligent, self-disciplined and more inclined to make “bad lifestyle choices.” If the pundits sometimes sound like the current Republican presidential candidates, this is not because there is a political conspiracy afoot. It’s just what happens when the people who get to opine about inequality are drawn almost entirely from the top of the income distribution.

Jay Rayner on ‘processed’ foods We all do this to some extent, I do too, I will consider myself admonished and try to do better in future…

 If you’re middle aged and not getting enough sleep, you’re rotting. Marvellous, just what I needed to hear!

Sleep is the greatest gift we’ve ever been given. It gives us energy, it makes us happier, it boosts our creativity, it stops our skin from looking like a wet burlap sack that’s been riddled with shotgun pellets. In fact, there’s only one thing better than being asleep, and that’s waking up at eight o’clock in the morning and then immediately deciding to go back to sleep. Show me a person who doesn’t enjoy that and I’ll show you a friendless lunatic.

 Jewish Terrorism in Israel

Yet at the same time, these terrorists are Jews in a Jewish state. And not only are they Jews, but even if their actions are driven in part by anti-liberal and anti-democratic ideas anathema to the Israeli state, they are also driven by ideas that are not so marginalized. The ideas that Israel shouldn’t compromise on territory or treat Palestinians or Arab Israelis equally are, to varying degrees, positions that exist within the mainstream discourse. Only a tiny fringe uses violence, but that fringe is embedded in a real constituency — settlers — that get angry if they feel persecuted.

On telling people who didn’t do well in their A Levels, that it will be fine.  It’s a good point. The thing is that it won’t be what you expected but it will more or less be ok but this is a very good point

Social mobility is, for the most part, a bust. How you do depends hugely on how your parents did. Pretty much none of us “deserve” the success or failure that comes our way: it is in large degree simply something we have inherited. This is wrong, and if you want to change it, you should do it like this: grab every bit of privilege that comes your way, turn it into power and use that power to get stuff done, before someone else can use their power to make the world even more obnoxiously unequal.

 

 

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Some thoughts on reading.

I was going to include this in the links post on Friday but I seem to have a lot more thoughts about this than I realised, so best I put it here. This is the thing I read on Monday that got me thinking about it.

Ebooks are changing the way we read.

E-books have changed the way I read but the idea of reading competing with checking email and video games and all the other stuff you can do on your phone is probably more relevant for digital natives. I’m firmly in the category of digital immigrant anyway but reading always is my distraction from pretty much everything so that doesn’t apply to me. IMG_2880The way I read has changed this year due to my resolution to buy no more than 12 books in 2015. I’ve used the library and the library e-books service more which means that I’ve read more on my i-pad than my kindle and more physical books. Each medium has it’s advantages and limitations. The ipad is too shiny and it’s difficult to read outside while waiting for the train, I also couldn’t read on it after 9pm because of the no screens an hour before bed rule. Books especially large ones and hardbacks are awkward to carry on the commute. The kindle is great for reading something straight through but it’s hard to track back and re-read something. I love all of them, I love that on the very rare days, I forget my book or kindle, I can access the kindle app on my phone.photoWhat I’ve noticed, in the last few months is that not owning physical books, has made the sharing part of reading harder. Yes, I post about what I read and I talk about it but because I can’t lend my kindle or library books and reading becomes a more solitary pleasure.   This weekend, Jo grabbed a book off my bookshelves (a biography of Beau Brummell) and Ma borrowed a couple of Georgette Heyer’s, prompted by a conversation with Jo. Both Ma and Jo are frequent borrowers of the GH collection but both of them have their own copies of the ones that they love. Which lead to Ma reading me sections of Friday’s Child, where Ferdy is explaining that he’s being followed around by that Greek chap (Nemisis!). There is something about physical books which mean that as much as I love my kindle and the library e-book service, I won’t ever not have actual books in my house and the proof of me really enjoying something is that I buy a physical copy of it.IMG_3288Physical books are more than just the information inside them. I have books that my mother read as a child and those books connect me to her and my grandparents in a way that I don’t think a kindle ever will, because we both held this book in our hands to read it. Just as writing things by hand rather than typing them changes how we absorb information, I think what we read things on changes how we view the information we read. I loved reading the Temaire books this year but I am amused by how much I want to own the physical books and read those.

So yes e-books are changing how we read and there are many advantages to this but I suspect I never will lose my love of a paper book. A book that sits on a bookshelf reminding me of all the worlds I can visit and things I can learn.

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Things I am putting on my face

‘Austerity’ is my own personal motto this year, which means that I’m trying to find cheaper alternatives to the more expensive parts of my skincare routine as they run out. Someone recommended the Pure range from WaitroseSo I thought that I’d give it a go and bought the facial oil and the face polish.IMG_3287The facial oil is good, I use it at night after I’ve washed my face (in the evening, I cleanse with Waitrose Baby Bottom Butter and a hot flannel, it’s the lazy oil cleansing method and for me it works, brilliantly) it’s light and does a good job. The recommendation is to use it once a week but I’m using a couple of drops every night and my skin hasn’t broken out or had any sort of reaction to it. In the morning, my skin feels soft and well hydrated. It’s not scented and not the experience that using the Clarins Lotus Oil is but it works

I was more worried about the face polish as I traditionally have more issues with them, but this wasn’t scratchy and didn’t make my face sting. It’s heavier and my skin came out feeling very soft but the oils in the polish sort of sat on my face for a bit. This didn’t worry me as I have quite dry skin and I wasn’t going out so I just skipped moisturiser for a bit and did other stuff. I wouldn’t put make up on my face after using this and I’ll see how I get on with it through the month but so far so good.

Both are £2.99 and worth checking out. The range is designed as a budget range with most items priced from £1.99 and not more that £3. I’m going to have a good at the eye serum, I think I may need to start with that now I’m well into my 40’s!

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Life Happened – Birthday week

Birthday weeks are the best weeks…

IMG_3259Slides (I loved them!)IMG_3261ManhattansIMG_3265and birthday cakesIMG_3267Family lunchIMG_3271OliIMG_3273and Ms T (with the glamorous hair!)IMG_3275Sunday breakfastIMG_3282and a religious procession at the end of my roadIMG_3285Not photographed – a migraine, carrot cake, Ma doing my ironing, a bit of shopping, a lot of wine and an ice lolly.

Now back to work for 2 5 day weeks until another week off..I love August…

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Words to live by

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Friday Links

Happy Friday…

I wasn’t going to comment at all about the ‘Planned Parenthood are selling baby parts’ story because it’s not happening here but then a friend of a friend on Facebook mentioned it it all seriousness and so this seems like the most appropriate response to it.

Boris Johnson and the new Routemaster. I loved the old ones, I don’t like the new ones and buses should have conductors…

Clinton emails reveal what Sidney Blumenthal thought of Cameron. While I don’t agree with his thinking that Tony Blair should have been president of the EU, his thoughts on Dave are pretty damning.

“On foreign policy, Cameron is unsure, inexperienced, oblique, and largely uncommitted. So far his foreign policy is little more than projection of his domestic politics.”

Suzanne Moore on Cilla Black. I’m sorry, but she wasn’t an amazing singer. Go and listen to her rendition of ‘Anyone Who Had a Heart’. See. It’s screechy.

And onto another person I have always had doubts about. I know that it’s fashionable to say it now, but I’ve always thought there was something off about Camila Batmanghelidjh, (no grown person needs 3 PA’s) I didn’t doubt that her heart was in the right place but I just didn’t really didn’t trust her or her methods. (my gut is never wrong about these things, Boris Yeltsin,  Kids Company is closing down today which is what happens when you throw money at something and don’t build proper foundations.

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The Answer to Life, the Universe and Everything

I know the answer is 42, I was hoping that on my 42nd birthday, I would wake up this morning and know everything. Alas, it’s not the case and this morning, I still know what I know and I’ll have to learn the rest.

So Happy Birthday to me and because I’ve been reading them lately, one of Jonathan Swift’s Birthday Poems to Stella (it’s a cheat because this was for her 43rd birthday but anyway…)

As when a beauteous nymph decays,
We say she’s past her dancing days;
So poets lose their feet by time,
And can no longer dance in rhyme.
Your annual bard had rather chose
To celebrate your birth in prose:
Yet merry folks, who want by chance
A pair to make a country dance,
Call the old housekeeper, and get her
To fill a place for want of better:
While Sheridan is off the hooks,
And friend Delany at his books,
That Stella may avoid disgrace,
Once more the Dean supplies their place.
  Beauty and wit, too sad a truth!
Have always been confined to youth;
The god of wit and beauty’s queen,
He twenty-one and she fifteen,
No poet ever sweetly sung,
Unless he were, like Phoebus, young;
Nor ever nymph inspired to rhyme,
Unless, like Venus, in her prime.
At fifty-six, if this be true,
Am I a poet fit for you?
Or, at the age of forty-three,
Are you a subject fit for me?
Adieu! bright wit, and radiant eyes!
You must be grave and I be wise.
Our fate in vain we would oppose:
But I’ll be still your friend in prose:
Esteem and friendship to express,
Will not require poetic dress;
And if the Muse deny her aid
To have them sung, they may be said.
  But, Stella, say, what evil tongue
Reports you are no longer young;
That Time sits with his scythe to mow
Where erst sat Cupid with his bow;
That half your locks are turn’d to gray?
I’ll ne’er believe a word they say.
Tis true, but let it not be known,
My eyes are somewhat dimmish grown;
For nature, always in the right,
To your decays adapts my sight;
And wrinkles undistinguished pass,
For I’m ashamed to use a glass:
And till I see them with these eyes,
Whoever says you have them, lies.
  No length of time can make you quit
Honour and virtue, sense and wit;
Thus you may still be young to me,
While I can better hear than see.
O ne’er may Fortune show her spite,
To make me deaf, and mend my sight!
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Cake

This week I will bake myself a cake. It won’t be all for me, there will be Ben, Laura, Oli, Josephine, Tabitha and Ma to help me eat it. There will not be candles, the last time I had a birthday cake with candles was also the last time someone baked me a cake for my birthday. It was my 21st. I’m not complaining I’ve just learnt that if I want a birthday cake (and who the hell doesn’t want birthday cake?) I have to make it myself. So I do.20140804-095007-35407773.jpgI have noticed that my birthday cake baking is now tends to be the following 4 things because they work, I know they work and no-one complains about them.

The Birthday Cake

The first time I made this was for Oli’s 1st birthday. I made it in various badly decorated versions until he was 4. That was the year of the decorating disaster that we shall never speak of although Laura made Oli’s cake for his 5th birthday which was probably for the best. I can cook but decoration is beyond me.photoIt’s a perfect party cake, sturdy but not solid and lightly favoured.

The Custard Power Cake

This is a Nigella Lawson recipe, she thinks it makes a great birthday cake, which it does, and you can make it quickly on a Saturday morning when the first cake goes wrong (not that I’ve ever needed to do that!). In the example below, I sacrificed Oli’s birthday card to get the shape of the 4….20131125-084835.jpg

There’s the ever adaptable Carrot Cake.Back Camera

This is the cake I make most. I joke that I am the Baxter birthday baker and it’s always this cake that I get asked for, in fact this year the toddlers and I made the cake for Adam, while Kathy tried to get some work done.DSCF0825I’ve made some changes from the original, more carrots, the addition of raisins or sultanas, lots more cinnamon (like at least triple the amount!). I don’t make a cream cheese frosting because I get that so wrong on a regular basis and this one is easier to manage.

Finally pavlova. Its not cake but it’s another thing that no one I know turns down.IMG_2847

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Reasons to be Cheerful July 2015

I got to spend time with Oliver at the beginning of the month and he was mostly delightful. He explained adhesion to me “when two things stick together, like a nose and candyfloss”. He is a self confessed drama queen (a Dempsey for sure!) but also funny, curious and clever. This is his scary face.IMG_3164Breakfast for a week in July was this and it was amazingIMG_3187Kindness from others, I nearly fainted on the Tube one morning and the girl who walked me to the Victoria Line train and gave me some water, by freaky co-incidence, lives in Fulham right next to where I used to live.

A weekend where all plans got cancelled lead to dinner at Ma’s (and fizz!)IMG_3225An appointment about my foot. It was a frustrating couple of hours but I’m still amazingly grateful for the NHS, which hopefully will survive in spite of the governments best efforts to destroy it.IMG_0039

Haircut. Last thing in July a much needed haircut. I can see through my fringe!   

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Life Happened – High Society

Some weeks  are really hard and you really feel it, some are still hard but good and this week fell into the later category. All of the things that are difficult in my life were still difficult, I’m still struggling with my breathing more than I’d like, I’m still feeling poor, my feet still hurt, work is boring and frustrating in equal measure and I have raging PMS but last week did not feel like a disaster.

Why?

I did the things at home that needed doing, I went to bed early, I forced myself to get out of bed when I really didn’t want to, I took a half day on Wednesday to sort myself out, I changed my route home from work so I walked for half an hour first which helped me transition from work to home. In short, I got a grip on myself and being in control really helps me get things into perspective, so that I could really appreciate the nice things that did happen this week.

There was bread pudding mostly for Jane because she needed something nice..IMG_3242And a haircut which I really, really needed..IMG_3249-0I got two early birthday cards, from Kathy and Adam, and from Jane and co. (Jane also gave me a bottle of Champagne because she knows me well, and K&A, who also know what I like, bought me the Franco Manca pizza book!). On the way back from Jane’s, I picked up a huge bag of free rhubarb from the allotments near her. There is crumble in my future…IMG_3245I also popped round to see Kathy & Adam and the Baxter babies, we had pizza and watched A Close Shave, with the youngest of the two telling me about the ‘bad dog’ whenever he appeared! Those children are delightful but I don’t think K&A are going to get any proper sleep until they’re teenagers!

On the way home, I discovered that Waitrose are selling Gin and Tonic Ice Cream (like they read my mind!)IMG_3252On Saturday, Ma and I went to see High Society at the Old Vic. It was good but my problem with it was that it wasn’t The Philadelphia Story which is better…IMG_3256The rest of the weekend was passed reading, relaxing and generally loafing around.

A good week…

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