Life Happened: Drudge

Posted on November 28, 2016 by nicdempsey

It was another straightforward week.

Oli turned 7img_5436Getting into work was an experience in frustration every day.

and stupid questions abounded

I had a flu jab, slept loads, painted my nailsimg_5450did some work at the allotment On Saturday night I babysat for Kathy and Adam, the children were a delight and I got to watch Match of the Day and it was a weekend where Chelsea won!

On Sunday, I did very little. I was supposed to go Kathy and Adam’s for a belated Thanksgiving but I just didn’t have the emotional energy for other people. I’m a natural introvert, that combined with a month were I have pushed through, done well at not being a complete hermit and given that it’s the end of the month, I just didn’t have a conversation in me. I was sad to miss the fun but I needed a day in my head because the coming week is going to be busy and I needed to charge for it!

Posted in How I Live | Tagged , , , , | Leave a comment

Sunday Music: O Come, O Come Emmanuel

Posted on November 27, 2016 by nicdempsey

It’s the first day of Advent, which means that I can start to think about Christmas, even if it’s not December yet!  The first Sunday of Advent is when I can start playing this year’s Christmas CD. This is the first song AND appropriate for Advent…

Posted in Christmas, Music | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment

2016 Goal Recap – November

Posted on November 26, 2016 by nicdempsey

There are technically four more days in November but as tomorrow will be spent either on the allotment or at home sorting out my life for next week and the last three days of it have three days of first aid training, two birthdays and Stef’s anniversary, I’m calling it done now!

I think by now everyone knows how I feel about November and that I wasn’t looking forward to it. Dreading it might be a more accurate description so I’m surprised to find myself saying that it wasn’t too terrible. Why? I’d be lying if I said that I had no idea but the answer is more complicated than ‘it was nicer than I was expecting’. I did more work this year because I’d given some consideration to the things that I would find difficult in November (being awake, enthusiasm, cheerfulness, organisation) and I put my resources into those areas. I worked on going to bed early and being out of bed by 6:30am, I did try to find something good about every day, I made an effort to be cheerful and when I couldn’t, I shut my mouth or I tried to! I put effort (even when I didn’t want to) into food prep and keeping up with the house, because all a sink full of washing up is going to do is bring my mood down.

I also was more accepting of feeling blue or not having energy, reminding myself that it’s a period of time, not forever and just getting on with it. Earlier in the month, I was surprised about how deeply I felt about something but I talked about it with a couple of people and was able to put it in it’s proper place.

So on to November’s goals.

Thankful. I’ve been doing this and you can go and see here.

FINANCE

No specific tasks, just staying on track and being mindful. Still there.

HOME

Clear out the messy cupboard. Done. The rest of the house is looking pretty good too.

BODY AND MIND

Stretching. I’ve been doing this much more often, it could be because it’s got the cold or maybe it’s my age but I found myself needing to stretch and before bed and sometime during the work day (stretching in the toilets not ideal but do-able!).

Going for a walk outside in the daylight. I managed this three days out of five when I was in the office but it’s been rainy and horrible so I haven’t been out as much as I should have.

ALLOTMENT

Burn one of the piles of weeds and organise the compost area (yes I have an area, it’s a mess!). Still not done. It’s really beginning to bug me but it’s just too wet.

New raised beds, order them and get them in place. Done all five assembled and in place and one of them planted with broad beans!

Sow broad beans and poppies. Broad beans done, poppies not.

Carry on with tidying the edges of the plot before we can’t work on the plot at all. We’ve done some of that at the top of the plot and we’ll work on the edges in December.img_5421-1

 

Posted in Goals | Tagged , , , , | Leave a comment

Friday Links

Posted on November 25, 2016 by nicdempsey

Happy Friday! I think that we’re just going to have to have a Trump section and then other links this week. It seems like every day, I think that he can’t do anything else more ridiculous and every day he manages it….

Obama reckons with a Trump presidency. This is a long read but worth it.

Remember folks, Trump is going to drain the swamp. Probably so it’s easier to get at the money. The President-Elect Is Suing Washington, D.C., So His Luxury Hotel Can Pay Less in Taxes

Trump takes credit for preventing something that wasn’t going to happen. Or the President-Elect is a lying liar who lies part 1000

The Enduring Scandal of the Trump University.

And on Tuesday, this happened which I don’t even have words for..

Vox wrote about it and quoted Christopher Meyer “it would be lunancy walking on stilts”

No Trump, We Can’t Just Get Along. About right…

Other news and opinion

Also American and worrying but not Trump what’s happening in North Carolina, that’s pretty scary…

Abortion in America, being out of options. You’ll never stop women having abortions, you’ll just make it less safe..

The enormous pop-up clinic trying to bridge America’s health divide. This is the awful warning for the NHS. “The things we fought for in the past, may be lost again unless we are prepared to fight for them” – Clement Atlee

The reality of ‘just about managing’ in Birmingham. The problem with just about managing is that the well off can feel that way too. I feel that way, it’s that sense of never being able to get ahead of yourself, to save, to plan, to have nice things. And people are feeling like that in much better circumstances than I’m in and much worse. I’m going to keep saying it, housing and it’s cost is at the root of most of the issues here…

Tony Blair wonders what has gone wrong with centre-left politics. and can’t see it him.

Our boys need to be rescued too. True but this is as much about placing a middle class value on what is good, which is less to do with how we raise boys and more about the value we place on academic learning. My brother is brighter than I am, but I’m more academic and can argue better. Neither of us are stupid we learn differently and want to do different things with our learning. Why is only way (mine) considered better? Clue, it’s not because I’m a girl…

Why older men who date younger women are so infuriating. I don’t know that it’s infuriating, so much as really icky.

The macaron is a pastel menance.

Jeanette Winterson on her Christmas traditions. Sometimes I find Jeanette Winterson really difficult and I don’t agree with her about lots but the quote below is just perfect and if given the terrible time she had with her parents, she can find that in herself well that’s pretty amazing. Also trifle with tinned fruit is the only way to make it!

I think about that time and, without being sentimental, I am sure that if we can find reconciliation with our past – whether parents, partners or friends – we should try and do that.

It won’t be perfect, it will be a compromise, and it doesn’t mean happy families or restored bonds – there is often too much damage, too much sadness – but it might mean acceptance and, the big word, forgiveness.

I have learned, painfully, over the years that the things I regret in my life are not errors of judgment but failures of feeling.

So I am glad of that last Christmas with my dad – not because it rewrote the past, but because it rewrote our ending. The story, for all its pain and sometimes horror, did not end tragically; it ended with forgiveness.

Posted in Links | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

A week of lunches and breakfasts.

Posted on November 24, 2016 by nicdempsey

I read somewhere that the key to having a sucessful life was to reduce the amount of decisions that you needed to make in the course of a day. The theory is that you have a limited amount of brain capacity that you can devote to decisions and if you start off by making lots of them, you lose that capacity and that leads to chaos. Ok maybe not actual chaos, maybe more “I can’t decide what to cook for dinner, let’s order in” type chaos.

I don’t know if the theory is accurate or rubbish, but I notice that if I set up my day in advance (if I know what I’m wearing, where my keys are and what the plan for breakfast is) then I don’t feel that I spend the day feeling behind.img_5415Everyone knows this. There are people who can be effective, creative, happy and chaotic, but I am not one of those people, I am like a toddler, I need routine and certainty to function properly and thrive.

The only downside to this is that because I’m an adult, I have to enforce the routine and certainty upon myself because I don’t have a parent to do it for me (she retired, exhausted after years in the field with me, Ben and my Dad!). This means that I need to make time to do the things that will make my weekdays less stressful. This is the worst thing about being an adult, it’s that you have to show up and do the work. Things won’t work unless you do. Things can go wrong sure but all of adult life involves getting the hell on with it.

I’ve been open about how menu planning keeps me on track financially and stops food waste and it’s been fairly clear in the last 8 months that all the produce coming off the allotment saw my strict menu planning relax a little bit. But the allotment has stopped producing, there are things growing but very, very slowly. So I need to get back to effective menu planning because I no longer have 24 courgettes a week to turn into food!img_5295-1Which is why on Sunday night my fridge contained all my lunches and breakfast for this week and why they are all the same thing. Lunches are leftovers from Saturday night, dahl, rice and chana masala and flatbreads. Breakfast will be an egg roll. All of this can be heated up in a microwave at the office and I chopped a load of carrots and peppers to go with it. This week the only cooking I’ve had to do has been dinner. New recipes are always fun and cooking can be creative but sometimes (and for me that time is almost always in November!) feeding yourself is effort and frontloading the week is what works.

Posted in Cooking, Food, How I Live | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment

Allotment Adventures: Wind, Rain and Raised Beds

Posted on November 23, 2016 by nicdempsey

It’s been roughly a month since I last wrote about the allotment. In that time the clocks went back and November got really serious about being a horrible month.

The lid blew off the box of tools, it has rained and rained and we’ve had a couple of frosts. So the marigolds and courgettes came up, no more courgettes until next year!img_5418We bought and put together five more raised beds, watched the garlic and onions pop up and planted broad beans. There was a delivery of woodchip at the weekend, so I decided to mulch the raspberries, I’m still not entirely convinced that we should keep them in that spot but they are going to stay there for the next year and the best raspberries on the site are from the plots that mulched this year, also if it keeps the weeds down so much the better.There are three long beds at the bottom of the plot, my plan is to grow tomatoes and cucumbers in these next year and its nice to have them in place. Other than Ma, you can also see the other onion bed.We will get around to framing the other three beds in the middle of the plot but that’s not going to happen until spring time.Between now and Christmas, any work we do will be on the edges, pulling and digging up the couch grass. At some point we will do some burning but it’s just been too wet, we will get to it though, not least because I want another compost bin there!

It’s all about doing things that will make our lives easier in the summer but it’s looking good.

Posted in allotment, Gardening | Tagged , , , , | Leave a comment

Food and Budget Update: 12/11 to 18/11/2016

Posted on November 22, 2016 by nicdempsey

Another week at the top of my spending limit, I didn’t realise now much the allotment produce was helping me with keeping within my limits! I was really craving fruit and vegetables this week and trying hard to eat better more mindfully.

I actually got around to some proper food prep this week, making a butternut, chickpea and spinach curry, (it was good but it needs some work), I also peeled the pomegranate (is it peeling – or something else!) so it was really to eat during the week. I ran out of time on Sunday for anything more elaborate so on Monday night I made feta and spinach muffins. I tend to be busy at the weekend at the moment, the allotment is still taking up quite a chunk of time and that’s not likely to change so I do need to change up food prep because my life works better when I do.

SHOPPING

I forgot to take a photo of my shopping because I am an airhead! But I did a Lidl shop which came to £13.17 and then another at my Tesco metro on Sunday afternoon for flour because I managed to buy brown bread flour and self raising flour on Saturday but forgot to buy plain flour! So another £1.69 and a total of £14.86. 

Highlights of this weeks shop were a pomegranate (I love those things!), all the flours, and the rest of it was either staples I was out of (sea salt, butter, cheddar) or my usual stuff and produce depending on what offers there were (aubergine, tinned tomatoes, yoghurt, leeks, cucumber, pears, plum tomatoes, onions)

FOOD

Ma bought dinner on Saturday night, we did the M&S dine in for £10. It was pork wrapped in pancetta, with roasted vegetables (and then some extra roasted vegetables because one packet is never enough veg – I come by it honestly!)img_5373Followed by profiteroles.img_5374Sunday morning we had crumpets for breakfast and then a saute of potatoes and veg with a fried egg.img_5390

Monday’s breakfast was yoghurt, pomegranate and granolaimg_5394Lunch was a baked potato and butternut, chickpea and spinach curry. I also ate 2 pears and some grapes. I don’t eat a lot of fruit but I was clearly in the mood today, as that was four of my five portions of fruit and veg, I ate more than one portion of veg as well, so maybe my body was trying to tell me something!img_5396Dinner was roasted vegetablesimg_5398Tuesday’s breakfast was the same as Monday’s. Lunch was muffins and vegetableimg_5404Dinner was curry and rice and flatbreadimg_5405Thursday breakfast was Wednesday’s lunch, a muffin and vegetables. Lunch was last night’s dinner but in smaller portions. Dinner was pasta with leeks, peas and bacon. There was white sauce too. I always over cater where pasta is concerned, after I served this, I put half of the leftovers in a pot for Friday lunch and the rest in a baking dish for the freezer, that’ll be a dinner sorted next week or the week after!Friday breakfast was a muffin, lunch was pasta leftovers Dinner was Friday Night Pizza

Posted in Cooking, Food, Money | Tagged , , , , , | Leave a comment

Life Happened: Tired but productive

Posted on November 21, 2016 by nicdempsey

Last week passed and it was pretty standard. I’m up to date at work and home, I’m just totally exhausted, which I think is a winter thing. I’m always really tired at this time of year, so I just need to power through it. The weather was either lovely and clear or really wet. It started off un-seasonally warm and ended with the first winter storm, Angus. img_5403The trains were annoying, so no real change there We did some work on the allotment
And there was wine.Not pictured was Sunday dinner with the Baxters, which was lovely and a Sunday arsing about at home.

This week is my last straight 5 day working week for a little bit, which should be interesting and a flu jab, if you’re not living on the edge, you’re just taking up too much room!

Posted in How I Live | Tagged , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Friday Links

Posted on November 18, 2016 by nicdempsey

Happy Friday! After yesterday’s little diversion, today I’m just going to link to other, more intelligent, writing on the state of the world!

Rural America has just picked a President that won’t help them. Sing it.

Murder in Burundi: the man who knew too much. This is awful, it’s also a reminder of how elections and the peaceful transfer of power can go wrong.

How half of America lost it’s f**king mind. This is more about the urban vs. rural problem but worth a read.

Autocracy: Rules for Survival. Written by a Russian, something to think about.

We are doomed. Boris Johnson ridiculed by European ministers after prosecco claims.

Time for some light relief. 19 Totally Real Conversations Obama And Biden Have Had Since The Election

Our skin is covered with invisible stripes. So I’m like a tiger then!

Posted in Links | Tagged , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Rights, freedoms, duties and obligations: Why we need to stop criticising the US and learn about our Constitution

Posted on November 17, 2016 by nicdempsey

I was going to put this in tomorrow’s post but it got a bit long, so no food or allotment post today, come back next week.

I’m British, this is written from that perspective, I am not disputing the right of US citizens to elect whoever they damn well please. I can disagree with your choice, I can worry about the affect this is going to have on the world, on black and minority Americans and even on the people that voted for him and you can’t stop me. You just go ahead and do what you need to do and I’ll pray that the planet isn’t destroyed before you have another election. This is primarily about my fellow British citizens and what they have been saying about Americans in the last week.

My frustration isn’t just about people having a go at the USA (it can look after itself), it’s about increasing ignorance in this country that worries me. Last week, the right wing popular press launched an attack on the judiciary and I wrote something about that. This last week, I’ve heard so much criticism and implied superiority from people around me that are ignorant and don’t understand either our system or the American one.

I happen to know a bit about the American system because I studied it at A level but I know about mine because that is my duty as a citizen and and voter to learn about it, to know and understand what I’m participating in. It straight up frightens me that so many people don’t. My friend, Kathy became a British citizen yesterday, she had to take the Oath of Allegiance and Pledge of Loyalty. Here they are:

Oath of Allegiance: “I swear by Almighty God that, on becoming a British citizen, I will be faithful and bear true allegiance to Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth the Second, Her Heirs and Successors according to law.”

Pledge: “I will give my loyalty to the United Kingdom and respect its rights and freedoms. I will uphold its democratic values. I will observe its laws faithfully and fulfil my duties and obligations as a British citizen.”

I’m not so keen on the one about Queenie, I’m a republican, but how many of us would be able to articulate our rights, freedoms and obligations as citizens? Certainly not the editor of the Daily Mail based on last weeks performance.

We need to stop bashing the US and Americans and pretending that the British system is better and that our electorate wouldn’t do this. I get it, it’s horrifying, Trump is a clown, he’s ignorant, duplicious and orange and look at who he’s appointing? I half joking told Ma the other day that maybe we should be reading Revelations because surely this is a sign of End Times. There are a couple of reasons, I’m trying really hard not to…

First, I know lots of Americans and not one of them voted Trump although yes, many of their family and friends did.  I know how this feels because many of my friends and family voted for Brexit (happy is the person who can say that their nearest and dearest share the same politics as them, I can’t). Many of the people I know that voted for Brexit, are asking how the hell could Trump have happened. This amuses me. There will be lots of analysis about the people who voted for Trump and why they did so but I’m going to go with what I said after the referendum vote.

I know that angry, scared people make bad decisions, this a failure of politics and it was a close vote.

Second, Hillary won the popular vote, the majority of voters in the US didn’t vote for Trump. I understand that a Trump victory will be scary and have consequences for black and minority Americans (and the rest of the world) and it’s scary. However, the majority of Americans didn’t chose this. Why are we so superior? We’re not exactly doing brilliantly over here, post Brexit. Let’s think about this and not be name calling because it makes us feel less frightened and more intelligent.

Third, the electoral college is a stupid system which doesn’t correctly express the will of the people but the US system isn’t any better or worse than any other form of democracy which has been described as ‘the worse form of Goverment, except for all the others’  (and that’s Churchill so don’t be having a go about my lefty politics on this!). In the last 37 years no British government of either persuasion has won more than 43% of the popular vote. The popular vote for Trump, for better or worse, came in higher than that and in it’s 238 year history, there have only been 4 occasions when a US President been elected without a majority of the popular vote. Our system of government is not looking quite so superior now, is it?

Could we please understand our history, government and politics and work to reform and participate in them and hush with our moaning about other electorates in other countries?

Posted in Random | Tagged , , , , , , , | 1 Comment