September is the new January

Posted on September 5, 2024 by nicdempsey

We are out of August and into the last four months of the year, 2024 is going quickly.

This was last week at about 8:30 pm. I was not amused

September always feels like a new start because it was always the start of the school year and I tend to use it as a kick off to really start to think about surviving the darkness. Sunset is before 8pm now and this morning lights were needed as I got ready for the office, it’s time for the light lamp and for thinking about how to improve my mood as autumn and winter advance.

One of the things I’ve been sorting out in my head is new ways of doing things. I know I’ve been wanging on about it for a while but perimenopause has scrambled my brain a bit. I’m struggling with getting things done. Last week, when I was off work, I managed by just accepting that it would take some time to get me to move. When I’m actually working, it’s harder. Because work has been full on this year and not likely to get any quieter if this week is anything to go by. 

Work isn’t the only thing, there’s Mum, who will get her balance and confidence back but it won’t happen overnight, so I’m looking at a day a week (or more when there are appointments) to help with her stuff and just to see her because she’s still herself and fun to be around. The added thing that I need to factor in, is that Ma can’t come to me and help on the plot so I’m handling that by myself, and I do have my own housework to handle and my need for both company AND solitude.

Something to hold onto as we move into the dark months

I’m going to handle this, much like I handle anything I’m struggling, I’m going to make lists and power through it, while also giving myself some grace and some time for me. Which means that I need to set myself some goals.

This month, I need to focus on my habits.

  • Welcome back golden hour or more precisely, golden two hours. From 8pm to 9pm every night, I’m going to plan for the next day, I’m going to tidy the flat and kitchen, pack my lunch if I’m in the office the next day, pack bags and pick clothes. All the things that make the next morning work without disaster. 9pm to 10pm is wind down, bath, reading, bed.
  • Office days, I like working from home but being in the office on the regular is important for my work, my attitude, my team and everything else. So two non-negotiable days, on Tuesdays and Wednesdays I will be in the office in September.
  • Housework. If Saturdays are for Mum, then Fridays have to be for home. Friday morning, lunchtimes and evenings are for housework, cleaning the fridge, floors, hoovering, laundry I need to break the back of it on a Friday and set myself for success for the weekend and the week.
  • The Plot. Four hours on a Sunday, it can happen first thing or in the afternoon but four hours, has to be done.
  • Wake up time. I need to be out of bed at 7.30am every day (even the weekends). Days I’m in the office that’s easy, I’m out of the house by then but weekends and work from home days then it gets tricky. I need to break the habit of picking up my kindle or phone and getting kidnapped by a book. I need to get up, get dressed and then either start work or do things that need doing in the house
  • Blog. Finally, this space. I have always used this space as a way to guide myself, this month I want to give myself the discipline of four posts a week. That’s most likely to be miscellany, allotment, links and either recommended or music

I’m not going to set any major health things apart from take my vitamins, get sleep and eat well.

These are my plans for September and probably October, by which time, I hope they will be habits..

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Allotment Adventures: On the verge of massive change

Posted on September 4, 2024 by nicdempsey

Confession time, I didn’t get as much done last week as I wanted to, but I did get a lot done and the green waste bin is completely full and there are three and a half compost bags of weeds too!

I started weeding the gooseberry area. There was a lot of grass from the path and I worked up and around to the sweet potato bed and the middle area where the asparagus and sweet peas were planted. I will tackle the stuff growing through the gooseberries later (with long sleeves). I’m also going to g to weed fabric this area because I don’t want to keep weeding it!

Clearer, for now

There was a lot of weeding to do in the sweet potato bed which I did, I took up the sweet peas, and counted how many asparagus had survived of the 10 I planted earlier in the summer. Five are definitely alive and one is maybe alive. I planted another 10, so there are 15/16 in altogether. I also topped up with compost. Asparagus are heavy feeders so these will also get a top up of manure when the rhubarb does from now on. If I can keep that area, weeded and mulched and the asparagus alive, in just three years and a half years’ time, I could be eating home grown asparagus. I’ve wanted asparagus ever since I got the plot, it’s taken me 8 years to plant them but I’m glad to have finally done it.

Asparagus and a weeded sweet potato bed

There is now a path from the side path down beside the sweet potato bed into that area and I’ve bought some heath pearlwort and I’m going to grow it to make bigger pots and plant it on this path. If I need to I’ll also buy more for a nice lawny path that doesn’t need mowing. I’m enjoying having another way into the plot!

The new path

I cut back the mint bath and pulled up some more random weeds, but there is loads more to do there. I also harvested all the potatoes and watered everything.

All I need to do is keep it weeded!

It’s beginning to look a lot better. On Friday, I need to go and harvest for Mum, who wants tree spinach, tomatoes, mint, raspberries, and summer squash (if we have any). I also think I’ll give the tree spinach a big chop and work out which ones I’m leaving for seeds.

This weekend, my priorities are:

  • Move the compost.
  • Top up the ex-potato bed with compost and planting out the kale.
  • Compost top up for the alpine strawberry bed.
  • Weeding the area between the blueberries and the blackcurrants to get the worse of it sorted
  • Planting out the echinacea.
  • If there is time, finishing the weeding under the plum tree.
  • If there is even more time, start cutting back the rosemary and clear the two ‘hot boxes’ next to that.

Most of that is achievable, if I pull my finger out!

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Allotment Adventures: The Fruit of my Neglect

Posted on August 28, 2024 by nicdempsey

While I wouldn’t say this is the worse year I’ve ever had, it’s been full on and full of stuff I didn’t count on and I haven’t spent as much time on the plot as I would have liked to and as a consequence it’s not looking as good I would like!

This is July and it’s not looking great!

I haven’t taken a photo of the front of the plot for a while because it’s been a weedy, overgrown mess. The weeds and grass come from the paths and it’s just wild. There’s a bed in the front for bulbs and I’ve tried to put other plants in to add interest but the grass just comes through the woodchip and the very nice soil of the bed. There’s a rhubarb right next to the path that had a really bad year and thinking about it had been there about seven years.

The grass is always going to be a problem, so time for a change. My plan was to dig up all the bulbs, extend the bed and plant other plants. Then there were six lavender plants for £4.99 at Lidl and I thought that I could plant a hedge!

I took this week off so I could blitz the plot and started on Monday, I spent a couple of hours tending my tomatoes.

An abundance of tomatoes


Yesterday, I really started at the front, I trimmed the sage and cola plant bed, removed some borage, and weeded the front four beds and the paths around them. I topped them up with more compost and in one of the beds planted a bunch of wildflower plugs and three thyme plants, (two that have been languishing on the plot and one that Jo bought me for my birthday) and a salad burnet plant (also languishing on the plot and needing a home!).

Wildflower bed

I moved the rhubarb crown and it split into 6, so I ended up adding another rhubarb row (can never have too much), I also planted one in a bucket either for Sue if she decides to try again in her garden or if not to sell in the plant sale next year.

I tackled the weeding at the front and planted my lavender hedge with six lavender grosso plants from Lidl and one plant that had self seeded in a bed and I relocated. I also trimmed the lavender that marks the divide between the beds and the blueberry plots.

Tuesday night starting to look better LOL

Finally, I got around to watering and feeding the tomatoes, strawberries and the polytunnel, where I found padron peppers! Even when I ignore it, there is something.

Padron peppers

On Wednesday, I waited in the morning to get my plants delivered and deal with the itchy bites! On Wednesday afternoon I tackled the grass, on the one hand the soil is really good so it’s easy to pull up the grass roots, on the other, there were so many. I got a lot of bulbs up but have no idea if I got them all and I know there are probably roots I’ve missed but I did my best. I got to a point where I’d done all the weeding I could do, there was more to do but I didn’t have it in me. So I covered the ground with cardboard and compost and then planted all my plants.

In that bed are; the day lily that’s been there forever, lavenders, (two relocated from else where on the plot so probably Hidcote and the six Lidl lavender Grossos), a cola plant (that had rooted itself from the one I have so I thought I’d stick in in), three French tarragon (because I’m an optimist at heart and this is my this third attempt this year – I really want to make bernaise sauce), chamomile lawn and woolly thyme on the borders, a relocated sage, Roman chamomile that was already there, and a grapefruit mint. (Yes I know not to plant mint in the ground but that’s been there three years and hasn’t conquered the world yet).

Finally, I harvested purple sprouting broccoli, tree spinach and mint for Mum!

I still have to tackle the bit under the tree, move the compost bags and tidy and paint the shed but I’m much happier with it overall.

Tomorrow is a day off for Mother related things and then I start again on Friday. With that bit under the tree and/or the bit in middle aka the new asparagus bit, which needs weeding….this needs a list

  • Weed/sort under the plum tree by the hedge
  • Move compost
  • Weed/tidy/mulch the gooseberries, create the path to the sweet potato bed and asparagus bed/’wild area
  • Weed the sweet potato bed
  • Weed the asparagus bed and the ‘wild area’
  • Sort out the strawberries
  • Sort out the blueberries
  • Weed main paths
  • Weed/tidy between the blueberry and blackcurrant beds
  • Dig up potatoes, top up bed, plant kales
  • Plant chard and spinach beet for autumn/winter
  • Trim all the mints
  • Trim herbs on plot (lavender, thyme, oregano, winter savory)
  • Top up alpine strawberry bed
  • Trim the rosemary bush/old herb bed
  • Harvest/cut down the tree spinach
  • Paint Shed
  • Tidy Shed
  • Sort out the bed moved to create the asparagus bed
  • Sort out the iris bed
  • Posts and wires on the raspberry beds
  • Sort out the rose garden/pond section
  • Weed the unused squash bed (unused because overgrown!)
  • Weed back area before boysenberry
  • Sort out the rampant boysenberry currently trying to take over the world
  • Sort out compost bins, comfrey and roses at the back of plot
  • Tidy patio area
  • Identify beds for garlic
Hiding soo much mess

That’s a brain dump of everything I need to get done for autumn/winter. I hope to get up to ‘Trim the rosemary bush by Sunday but it is a lot, come back next week for the update!

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Friday Links: Binfire

Posted on August 16, 2024 by nicdempsey

Happy Friday!

As a former IDF soldier and historian of genocide, I was deeply disturbed by my recent visit to Israel. This is so worth reading. I also want to recommend Ami Ayalon’s book ‘Friendly Fire‘, which is are really good look into how Israel got to this place.

New round of Gaza ceasefire negotiations begin without Hamas. Nothing is going to change, until we take away their toys. For the West, that’s funding Israeli weapons…

Welcome to the Liz Truss school of free speech: you can criticise anyone – except her

The shrunken state expects families to fill the voids in health and social care. Woe betide those without children. This has really hit home to me over the last couple of weeks…

Declutter, Haul, Restock, Repeat I find this fascinating, I find these accounts fascinating especially the fridge restocks, so much UPF, and so much consumption..

Despite Recent Headlines, Urban Farming Is Not a Climate Villain

‘Now you can have rest in your home’: the mirror roofs cooling homes in Freetown. Josephine is going to Freetown next month, so of course articles keep popping up about Freetown.

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Cliveden

Posted on August 13, 2024 by nicdempsey

Sue and I went to Cliveden last week, which is an National Trust property and I just found out for every visitor that comes the site gets £3.90 in funding..

The gardens are great and I really enjoyed the Long Garden because veg!

The Long Garden

The grounds are lovely, hilly but lovely.

So many stairs
The river
No idea what these are but they are fabulous
Never knowingly under picnicked!

The unexpectedly magical find was the Round Garden. It’s an orchard laid out in the 19th Century and maybe the only surviving example of this planting style. The trees are trained to grow either side of a hoop, so you walk through tunnels of apple and pear trees. The orchard fell out of use in the 1950’s and became a haven for wildlife, the ranger team at Cliveden are gently restoring it but trying to maintain the wildlife diversity.

If I ever have the theoretical homestead then this is the type of orchard I want!

Being a National Trust property there were plants to buy, so I did!

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Monday Miscellany: Another Year Around the Sun

Posted on August 12, 2024 by nicdempsey

Happy Monday!

My birthday week off, didn’t go quite to plan! I’ve officially been to my mum’s GP practice more this year than I’ve been to my own! Ma will probably read this and feel bad, but she shouldn’t, but it did mean that my week was more bus, less allotment than planned.

I did go to places besides my mum’s house and GP last week though. On Wednesday, Sue and I went to Cliveden. The last time I was there, was for a Guide camp over 30 years ago. It was a lovely day.

Dinner with Jo and the sidekick!

On Friday, Christelle and I went to the Physic Garden in Chelsea and had a wander around.

This week is work and watering and mother things. I’ve come back to quite a bit of work and this Monday was officially the hottest day of the year. It’s all going to be fine!

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Monday Miscellany: Missing for most of July

Posted on August 5, 2024 by nicdempsey

Happy Monday and August!

I know I’ve been missing in action for most of July and large part of the year. You know what? That’s ok, I’m not doing this for the views – I started this blog back when I lived at my uncle’s in Fulham and it pulled me out of a hole. I’m never going to be an influencer because I have too many things I’m interested in, I’m no good at teaching and I’m the queen of ‘can’t be arsed’. So I’m not going to stress too much!

Life has felt busy this year, my life is currently full of shoulds and musts and while I am grateful for most of the shoulds and musts (because money, a place to live and people that I love are really good things to have) I’m contrary and I’m not enjoying it. If I ever wonder why I’m single and childless, this essentially is the essence of it, I don’t like to commit!

All that being said, July has been a trickier month than I expected. There was good stuff, a new government, an allotment open day (and a gold award for the plot), a work day in Southampton, lots of work godchildren back from Uni, a beer festival, a walk and lunch with Christelle and the dogs, the Euro finals (I finally bought a TV license so I could watch England play badly and then lose. I know we deserved to lose but it wasn’t fun) COVID from the newly returned godchildren (which included the worse non migraine headache I’ve had in forever). Working from home is great, it really reduces sick leave, because you can go and sleep when you need to and then send documents out at 10:12pm. I didn’t really rest because I’m in that place, there is no rest, there is retirement or death, I’ll rest then!

Finally on the last weekend of the month, Ma had another fall, a really bad one and she knocked herself out. we both got to add a ride in an ambulance to the list of things we’ve not done before and 9 hours in A&E later, via some stitches and a CT scan, we went home. I have been expressive in my love for the NHS but the problem with a service that is grossly underfunded, is that it’s focus is on crisis, not prevention. Ma’s balance has become a huge problem, but because she doesn’t break anything, they just send her home. I’m about to become a very squeaky wheel to get her a referral to the falls clinic and to get some investigation of why her balance has become so terrible over the last couple of months.

So I’m hopeful that August will be better, but we’ll see. This week, is actually my birthday week and I do have some plans. I’m going to spend a day with Sue at either Kew Gardens or Cliveden, dinner with Jo and the Chelsea Physic Garden with Christelle. I do want to spend some time on the plot but I’m also going to the doctors with Ma so she can get her stitches removed. Before that, this morning I need to do a small amount of work for reasons I won’t talk about (but it wasn’t me!) and then holiday!

Have a good week!

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Allotment Adventures: Pretty flowers, weeds everywhere

Posted on June 26, 2024 by nicdempsey

I’m short of temple and words this week, here are some allotment photos!

This bed has chives, the beans that survived slugmageddon, three tumbling Tom tomatoes, pansies and some marigolds.
Blackcurrant sage, cola bottle plant, lavender that will need to move soon and there’s some Corsican mint and chamomile lawn in there too
Brassicas all in, cauliflower, two beds of cabbage, brussel sprouts, purple sprouting broccoli and calebrese.
Strawberries, enough to eat but not enough to use

The first raspberry
Jasmine
Tomatoes didn’t like going outside but it’s plant Sparta, they live or they die
Some of the tomatoes are doing the right thing
Daisies that I did not plant or plan..
Plenty more work to do!
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Friday Links: Election Fever…

Posted on June 14, 2024 by nicdempsey

Happy Friday!

I’m really beginning to worry about the lack of thinking capacity and callousness of voters. Who are the people who think that Nigel Farage would make a good MP? Actually, I know some of them and it would be easy to classify them as ‘hard of thinking’, the truth is more that they don’t want to think too hard. They want certainty about the world and their place in it. They want it to be easy. That’s why it’s easier to blame immigrants and people who don’t want to work or spend all their money on avocado toast, than the system for why things are harder than maybe they were for their parents. It’s about a lack of rigour and honesty from the ‘mainstream’ politicians about what it would actually take to sort out the mess. Finally, it’s about the Press and the people that own it, promoting easy solutions rather than decency. However, the Farage is the worse sort of charlatan who can dish it and lie about it and can’t take it. It’s obvious by now. I really hope the voters of Clacton are bright enough and care enough to see it and not vote for him.

Don’t underestimate Faragism this election. He’s a virus infecting UK politics

When even Surrey’s middle classes are this angry with the Tories, you know it’s all gone wrong for Sunak

‘Solidarity over hatred’: the small band of Israelis stopping settlers obstructing aid trucks. I know it’s a drop in the ocean but I think it’s really important to highlight this. The sides are so polarised and I keep hearing that I can’t ‘both sides’ this conflict. I absolutely can and I will. So I blame both Hamas AND the Israeli government and the Western governments (including my own) that allow this to continue. However, it’s important to remember not all Palestinians are Hamas and not all Israelis support their government’s actions in Gaza and the West Bank.

Bowel disease breakthrough as researchers make ‘holy grail’ discovery

England’s Euro 2024 squad: Grealish and Maguire miss out on final 26. I don’t have a TV so I don’t get to watch England games as often as I’d like (that’s changing for this tournament, I’ve got a TV license so I can watch the games on my laptop!), I remember actually seeing Maguire in an England game and I could not fathom why he got picked. So that injury kept him out is probably no bad thing. I do feel for Grealish but as he said, he wasn’t in good form. Do I think we’ll win the Euros. Probably not, England play a lot better than they did but they just aren’t convincing. The best teams, generally but not exclusively, have a flow that I’m not convinced England have managed for a good long time. However, I also have to concede that I’m English, I never think the team is good enough. I am considering

Revealed: repairing Israel’s destruction of Gaza will come at huge climate cost.

‘We sold everything off, even the semen flasks’: the film about the farming couple who struck gold by rewilding

The big story of the 21st century’: is this the most shocking documentary of the year? This stuff keeps me up at night…

The period that almost killed me: ‘My mam was told, if you take her home, she won’t last the night’. This is horrendous, my bleeding is continuous but not heavy and I’m completely done with it. But what I notice is that until she said she wanted to have a baby, no-one wanted to help and I do wonder if this is why women going through peri-menopause and menopause have such a hard time accessing treatment because they aren’t having babies and therefore are viewed as surplus to requirements and somehow not deserving of treatment. It’s something I notice as I enter my ‘crone’ era…

‘Playing Russian roulette with your health’: my encounter with LA’s raw-milk, powdered-meat smoothie. I would not eat/drink a £18 smoothie, let alone one with powdered liver in it but I am currently drinking raw milk. Why? Because I’ve noticed that unhomogenized milk is kinder to my stomach and a friend suggested that raw milk might help too, so I thought I’d try.  So far so good!

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Friday Links: Election

Posted on May 24, 2024 by nicdempsey

Happy Friday!

So it seems we are to have a General Election on 4th July. Bonus points to the protesters, who realising he was calling an election, played ‘Things Can Only Get Better’ through Rishi Sunak’s speech! I picked the photo to highlight this post before the election was called but I stand by it.

Here’s to 6 weeks of chaos…

Jeremy Hunt and Mel Stride warn against benefits ‘lifestyle choice’ I spent a while living on benefits while unemployed and you have be in a bad way for it to be a lifestyle choice. I’ve talked about this before. I wasn’t ill, when I was unemployed, but it wasn’t a good time for my mental health either. When I was unemployed, I had help, from friends and family, both financial and emotionally (thanks Ma) and it still was awful. I do remember the advisor at the Job Centre, telling me I should look for work that paid less and I pointed out that I couldn’t afford that because I was entitled to no top ups and on £25k, I wouldn’t be able to pay my rent. What kind of alternatives are people facing where ‘choosing’ to be long term sick is preferable to work? Because my health has been pretty good over the last 6 years and I know what has made the difference. A work culture that appreciates my work and cares about my health, physical and mental. And demonstrates that by paying well and having decent benefits. This means I have money to afford my rent and the rest of my life, to save a bit. I have healthcare via work that can provide therapy, that pays 10% of my salary into a pension fund without the need for any contribution from me. All of this allows me to live and plan. It’s not much and it’s not rocket science. How bad does life have to be that benefits and vitriol from the overfed ministers of this government seem like a decent alternative. Jeremy Hunt and Mel Stride lack imagination and sympathy and are trying to disguise the government’s failure over more than a decade to do anything other than line their own pockets by scapegoating vunerable people. Don’t let them.

JCB built and supplied equipment to Russia months after saying exports had stopped. Does this surprise me, nope. Aren’t the owners of JCB the guys who hosted Boris Johnson’s last wedding? Maybe (as he’s such a supporter of Ukraine) he should have a word with them? Or maybe the Tories should send their donations back until JCB undergo an audit? I wouldn’t hold my breath…

I went a week without ultra-processed foods. Here’s what I learned

On the Problem of Rooting for the Women to Fix This. One of the reasons I would like the abortion law in the UK to change is because to have an abortion here, you need the consent of two doctors. That’s pretty easy to get but it would be pretty easy to change. The US though, is on the way to Handmaid’s Tale territory, it’s frightening…

‘Everything’s just … on hold’: the Netherlands’ next-level housing crisis

Emma Barnett on the Today programme review – so chilled John Humphrys will choke on his cornflakes. I’m trying to reserve judgement, I’m not generally keen on Emma Barnett we shall see.

The shocking stupidity of the smart meter system I refuse to get one until the energy companies agree to take on replacing faulty meters fitted by a previous energy company.

How rental ‘libraries of things’ have become the new way to save money

Super Gran actor Gudrun Ure dies aged 98. Read the books, watched the TV programme and now have theme tune (makes so much sense now I know that Billy Connolly wrote it) going through my head, ‘She’s a serious granny (supergran), a mysterious granny (supergran), ‘she does things that you never saw your granny do, is there nothing that she canae do’…….. 

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