Sunday Music: Give Me the Night

Posted on October 14, 2018 by nicdempsey

Today is my brother’s birthday. A couple of years ago he and Mum went to see George Benson. One of the things that all three of us agree on is George and it’s definitely something we both get from our mother!

Happy Birthday B.

 

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Recommendations: Always Infinity

Posted on October 13, 2018 by nicdempsey

Saturday recommendations are about the things I use and think work or help me in some way. Sometimes, I use things that I don’t like because I have to, for example, my hoover. It’s not a terrible hoover, it does the job but it’s also not something I’d recommend if someone I knew was in the market for a new hoover.

This is a very long winded way of explaining why these are on recommended list and also why we are about to talk about periods, so look away now if you’re squeamish about these things.

I’m (much to my dismay) still having periods, I was talking to a group of friends all in their forties about this and we are all of us, just done with it. While we know that the menopause is no walk in the park, we are all ready to stop having periods. Which is ironic if you consider how desperate we were to start having them as teenagers. More than 30 years in, I’m ready to stop. However, while perimenopause is kicking my arse with PMT, hormones and a slightly more irregular cycle, periods are still happening and I’m probably looking at another 10 years of this nonsense from my body.

I would love to be someone that could use a mooncup or tampons. I am not for a host of reasons but mostly to do with my insides, I have a retroverted uterus (it tilts the wrong way) and a problem cervix (being a woman is such fun!). I have tried, it’s never really worked and so mostly I use sanitary towels.

This is where we all need to take a minute and reflect on how far we’ve come in terms of sanitary protection. When I was a kid, they were really thick, like nappies and sanitary belts were still a thing (I never used one but they were an option). We talk about period poverty now, I’m lucky that it was never something I ever had to consider as a teenager but I like to think about the story of ‘Nuffield’s Nifties’. During the Second World War, Lord Nuffield supplied, at his own cost, sanitary towels to women in the Services, because they were new and therefore expensive, and women couldn’t afford them and the war effort couldn’t afford to have women at home when they could be working. It’s a great story about a kind thing, Lord Nuffield did but it reminds me that women, especially poor ones, were mostly still using rags. That’s my grandmother’s generation and it’s probably still the case in the Third World, so although being a woman sucks and periods are expensive to have, I am very lucky to live where and when I do, even in this!

So let’s get to the point. Always infinity are the best ones I have ever used because they (mostly) don’t leak and they aren’t scented. They are more expensive than the regular ones but I buy them in Savers where they are £2 a packet.

They don’t make me want to roller skate or fill me with joy but they make an awkward, messy week a bit less awkward and messy, which is all you really want them to do

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Friday Links: Brexit, Northern Ireland and Mum’s who shouldn’t tweet

Posted on October 12, 2018 by nicdempsey

Happy Friday! This week has been tough because it’s been so much darker in the morning and yesterday the bulb in the wake up lamp decided to die, that was not a fun morning! This weekend, I’m walking with Sarah and Fred, allotmenting and spending a Sunday with the family for my brother’s birthday. Fun

Here are this week’s links….

On Brexit, the Tories are gaslighting half the country

A Warning From Europe: The Worst Is Yet to Come. I’m not a fan of Anne Applebaum and I’m not sure I agree with her analysis of the causes of this issue but it’s worth reading anyway.

Ending Sexual Violence by Raising Better Boys. I’m not raising children but for those that are, I feel this is really useful and it fact it makes me thinks about the way I interact with my nephews. Mind you, the littlest one only comes near me if I have a blanket, because apparently all blankets are his!  But the point is, if we want change, we need to  make it and my observation is that the more we talk about this stuff the easier it gets.

Shoebox Britain: how shrinking homes are affecting our health and happiness

Amazon Created a Hiring Tool Using A.I. It Immediately Started Discriminating Against Women. Even robots are sexist…

How a mom’s “This Is My Son” anti-feminist brag went viral — and completely backfired. This is lovely, I’m not sure what she was thinking but she has a lovely, kind son…

As a decriminalisation bill is brought to Westminster, Northern Irish women tell their stories of abortion. The DUP has spent a lot of time telling the world that they don’t want NI to be treated any differently from the rest of the UK when it leaves the EU. The truth is they want NI to be treated differently all the bloody time. Women have been able to have abortions in the UK longer than I have been alive but not in NI. It’s apparently a devolved matter, they should campaign in NI but there is no devolved government in NI to talk to. If Scotland’s parliament couldn’t get itself together and form a government, Westminster would take control, but that doesn’t happen in NI. Ireland has always (on both sides of the divide) had a problem with its politicians, they are rank hypocrites and while Eire seems to be dealing with that, NI and especially the DUP is still busy saying no. Honestly, they need give themselves a talking to because the Prime Minister won’t.

The DUP has its ‘blood-red’ line. Does Theresa May dare cross it?. I agree with her about Sinn Fein, but they won’t, it’s that oath to the Queen. I’d take that oath with my fingers crossed but I do understand why they won’t, nationalism makes people a bit nuts…

Sleep: how much do we really need? Right now I need all of the sleep.

This is the very fattest bear in Katmai National Park. Fat bears!  I think I want to be a bear, a summer of mindless eating and then a really long sleep…

Puppy Cuteness Is Perfectly Timed to Manipulate Humans

The Viruses That Neanderthals Spread to Humans

 

 

Melania Trump: “I’m the Most Bullied Person in the World” Hyperbole, something she does have in common with her husband!

 

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Monthly Goals – September/October 2018

Posted on October 11, 2018 by nicdempsey

October has rushed past us and we’re nearly in November. October has been better than expected but I am struggling with the darkness a bit. I’m doing everything I can to keep from it getting worse and so far November is looking like it has the right amount of balance between challenge and people and being by myself and/or asleep….

So let’s recap October

Bedtime, Wake up time and Golden HourI’m sticking to the getting up at 6am and leaving the house at 7am-ish, bedtime at 10pm and golden hour are a bit harder but it makes a difference when I do it and I’m managing it 4 out of 5 days…

Walking

Walk to and from the station every work day. 30 min lunchtime walk when I’m in the office. I would award myself a 95% on this one. It’s a pain but it works!

Yoga

I’ll like to do something everyday while I’m on holiday (and maybe get Ma to do with me as she’s given up Pilates) and at least three times a week during the month. I got to this 2-3 days a week, not perfect but better…

Tone

Squats (20), sit ups (10), press ups (10). It’s pathetically little but I want to hit it every other day. 50% I’m not doing well on this.

HouseworkA weekly clean of the kitchen, hall and bathroom (including hoovering and mopping). Ironing, nothing that needs ironing hanging around more than a day. I can’t help but feel that the house is a mess, it’s not actually that bad, but I need a weekend devoted to it. I’m getting to most of this…

ProjectsDefrost the freezer/clear out the fridge. Clean the oven. No I did not do these things, again…

 

I’m going to Barter Books so time to get rid of my excess books, so I can trade them in for more books. Of course this is the one that I did, I got £18 for the old books and brought 4 ‘new’ ones back and paid for Ma’s ‘Life of Samuel Johnson’ with my profits.

Allotment

We didn’t do much with this list in October, we have a plan but it’s not going to see any significant work until mid November.

New things

  • Make a patio next to the shed
  • Buy sand,
  • Buy pavers
  • Level ground
  • Path next to shed
  • Woodchip
  • Borders
  • Pavers

Maintenance/planning

  • Paint the shed
  • Sow garlic and broad beans
  • Get the remaining lavender into the ground or bigger terracotta pots.
  • Sort out the canes and get rid of the weak broken ones
  • Manure the rhubarb
  • Manure and cover the beds we aren’t going to use over winter

Other 

Meal Planning and Food budget & Birthday/Christmas prep

Meal planning and food budget are more or less under control.

I’m getting myself sorted. I’ve bought Oli’s birthday present, I need to get Christelle and Ma’s birthday presents. For Christmas, I’ve bought a couple of small things for Christmas and honestly, other than doing that, I’m not going to fussed until closer to Christmas

My plans for November are more of the same, November is always a struggle for me, so I just want to concentrate on getting through with calm and no major issues so repetition is a good thing….

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Allotment Adventures: Discouraged

Posted on October 10, 2018 by nicdempsey

I’m feeling discouraged mostly because of the sodding aphids. I had to pull up some kale plants because they were infested, bloody infested with cabbage aphids. Then I went to pick some chard to find that the bloody ants have been at it with the blackfly. On the chard FFS! I hate them.

Hopefully, we have it contained but that combined with the end of the summer garden left me feeling a bit flat.

Still some things got done, I cleared the three sisters bed, Ma cut down the aramanth, I started pruning back the raspberries. Next week, we don’t have much time on the plot and the week after that is the pumpkin walk. It feel like October is rushing by and I haven’t got much done.

Today is Mental Health Awareness Day, so it’s probably a good time to acknowledge how beneficial the plot has been for my mental health. It has given me exercise, a new community of people and all of that has been great. It’s also made me much more aware of how miserable and tired I get at this time of year. Which is why I’m feeling so discombobulated right now. The foxes are digging up all the paths and the aphids and all I can see is what I haven’t done, can’t do or don’t have time for.

It’ll be fine because it’s not terrible, the plot is in pretty good shape, there is always work to do and my mood will improve in about 6 months!

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Monday Misc: WTF

Posted on October 8, 2018 by nicdempsey

I am not living my best life right now.

I’m tired, grumpy and feel that I’m severely lacking sleep. Welcome to autumn SAD’s.

Over the last week, as if to add insult to injury, I got completely soaked while walking the dog this weekend, I’ve had to pull up most of the kale because of cabbage aphids, I came on and this morning the a chunk of the bath mat decided to stay in the bath as I pulled it up!

All of these petty annoyances are nothing compared to the state of the world right now, which is going to hell in a handcart.

So I’m not feeling very optimistic about anything this week. It will pass but if anyone quotes Julian of Norwich to me, I might explode!

Given my stellar mood this week, I shall be doing very little, it’ll be a ‘work, home, sleep, repeat’ kind of week, because I shouldn’t be around people, it’s dangerous.

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Sunday Music: Vote ‘Em Out

Posted on October 7, 2018 by nicdempsey

It’s been a week. Sometimes you have to remind yourself that the political system we live in, is better than anything else you could have.

Thank you Willie

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Friday Links: Dancing Queen

Posted on October 5, 2018 by nicdempsey

Happy Friday!

First let’s get it over with, we live in a world where this is how the Prime Minister starts her speech to conference. It is not funny, she needs to give it up, she’ll never be funny, she’ll never be competent, it’s not a case of ‘she’s entertained us enough’, she’s never entertained us….rant over….

Anyway, this week I have been off my game. There has been loads of new but I can’t really cope with any of it. This is what I came up with..

The rise of cashless Britain: the poor suffer as banks and ATMs are closed

Dwarf planet ‘The Goblin’ discovery redefining solar system

This Four Thought is just lovely.

Don’t Be Mad at Roxane Gay’s Money Diary. Be Mad at the Genre Itself.

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Allotment Adventures: Ma Does All the Work

Posted on October 3, 2018 by nicdempsey

This weekend was the Ealing Half, so I was handing out water and left Ma on the plot with a packed breakfast, a flask of coffee and a worklist. She was amazing. We called time on all the summer and took the remaining winter squash in (including Oli’s tiny pumpkin – we’ll do better next year!). Ma also cut down all the tomatoes and I have tons of tomatoes ripening at home, time to make some chutney, I think!

It’s really funny how different the plot looks without my tomatoes.

We also emptied the compost from the buckets and pots and found grubs, which I left out for the birds and cleared up the rhubarb.

Disappointingly, we found that one of our kale beds has cabbage aphids. Which I’m not happy about. We’ll treat with mint tea and fairy liquid and scraping the buggers off and if that doesn’t work then I’ll open the bed for the pigeons. I’m also going to do the same to the other kale bed which doesn’t appear to be infected and get some mesh netting to protect them.

The work to be done over October and November is all about winter preparation and it’s a long list.

  • Clear the three sisters bed
  • Cut back the raspberries for next year
  • Dig up the raspberries to take them back and clear an area for autumn raspberries
  • Level and cover the ‘patio area’
  • Dig up the cucamelons and store over winter
  • Re-pot the last two lavenders
  • Manure the squash beds and rhubarb
  • Paint the shed
  • Line the shed
  • Cover beds not being used this winter
  • Sow broad beans
  • Sow peas
  • Plant out garlic
  • Sow mizuna, mustard and spring onions
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Sunday Music: Flicker and Shine

Posted on September 30, 2018 by nicdempsey

When Ma and I do road trips there is normally some Old Crow Medicine Show in the music mix.  This is Ma’s favourite but not really for driving, it makes you go faster…

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