Now Valentine’s Day is done

I didn’t celebrate Valentine’s Day way back when I was in a relationship, so I pretty much ignore it now, I’m happy for the people who get what they need from the day and that works fine.

However, any problem I might have with Valentine’s Day is about the idea that human beings are not worthy of respect unless they are in a relationship. I’ve talked about this before, as a single and childless woman (it’s bad for men but it is infinitely worse for women), I come up against this a lot.

Look, romantic love is not the be all and end all of existence. Ironically, I re-read Cyrano by Geraldine McCaughrean over the weekend and that is all about romantic and unrequited love (although I will never understand Cyrano’s love for Roxanne because she’s an airhead!) and this always strikes me as perfect for people who don’t have or don’t want a romantic partner

There are other things besides Love. It does not occupy every corner of every minute. It does not perch on the door to every room. It does not hang on every coat-hook in the hall. It is not an ingredient of every meal. There are the realms of Nature, Politics, Mathematics, Science. There are other things besides Love.

For a Man with an enquiring mind and any kind of genius there is always plenty to do.

Cyrano – Geraldine McCaughrean

This is the thing, no one’s life is worthless if we use it well. No-one is incomplete without a partner, in fact studies have shown that single people are more altruistic than people in couples and often happier. I’ve linked to in before but Bella DePaulo did a whole TED talk on it.

Guys being single is not the worst thing that can happen to you, if you are, please don’t think you are lesser, because one is a whole number….

About nicdempsey

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1 Response to Now Valentine’s Day is done

  1. Neil says:

    Grow flowers and sell them to all the foolish. Make enough money to pay someone to do the hoovering for you :p

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