It’s the week before Christmas and I’m not ready. I’m so not ready, to calm my panic, I’ve been making lists, when I’m panicky about something I turn into my mother only 100% less effective!

Monday disasters.

1) Knocking the kitchen roll off the microwave and onto the gas hob thus setting it alight.

2) Realising as I was about to leave the house that my travelcard was still in my jeans, that my jeans were in the washing machine that I had turned on five minutes earlier.

3) Bad day at work

4) The 45 minute journey home takes an hour and a half

5) On the train home, a stupid teenage pikey (yes I know, when I was a kid we called them tinkers and they were Irish!) spent 10 minutes telling me how much he’d like to rape me.  Yes it was just as delightful as it sounds…

Things that I have sort in the house before Christmas

1) Space in the fridge.

Ask yourself does one person really need 9 jars of jam in her fridge?

2) All the washing and the ironing.

Ma is coming to stay and the tree won’t fit if the airer is up.

3) Sort out a space for the tree.

No I don’t have one yet, and yes I do like to leave it until the last minute. Trees should not go up until Christmas Eve!

4) Clean the oven

Yorkshire puddings require a high oven and it needs to be clean. My oven is not clean at the moment.

Presents to buy/make/assemble

1) Ma’s

2) Ben and Laura’s

3) Oliver’s

4) Christelle and Mike’s

5) Tina and Charles’

6) Jo’s

7) Tabitha’s

8) Max and Danielle’s

9) Murphy’s

Number of cocktails I intend to drink on Wednesday night at the OXO

Three

Films I want to watch over Christmas

1) The Philadelphia Story

2) The History Boys

Are you making lists? What’s on them?